baby

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Preschool

It has been too long, once again, since I have blogged. Just like most things in my life, blogging will receive my attention and then my attention will be focused elsewhere. I do love to write. I often get scared away because of the many fabulous blogs I read out there. There are so many talented writers who simply draw me in on an emotional level. I anxiously await the next post. Also, so many of those bloggers have used their grammatical skills consistently and have retained the English rules. I am certain I could use a refresher course.

My intention for our blog was to allow family and friends follow us as they wish. It was also a way to document the events in our lives. I have fallen prey to the Facebook underworld. Facebook is a quick and easy way to give my loved ones updates and share my pride with so many. Plus, now that I own an Iphone I can truly be wherever and have all my devices with me. It is my camera, phone, video recorder and so much more. I will never go without such a device ever again! It is the best thing since the microwave and computer!

Now to the reason I decided to sit at my dusty computer and place the phone down. I need to write about preschool. Most of you Floridians know that our state offers a great program called Voluntary PreKindergarten (VPK) for those who have not heard about this I will explain. VPK is free to kids age 4. It allows the children to attend a school setting at any daycare/preschool facility that chooses to participate in the program. I believe two options are offered for the school schedule. The choice is three half days or two full days. I am not 100% certain on the schedule.

Moms have basic questions we ask each other. Most of the time we ask the questions to gauge our own progress with our kids. I enjoy learning new ideas from other moms and equally enjoy sharing what works for us. Without the communication with other moms my job would be more challenging. However, when I am asked, "Where are your kids going to preschool?" the music screeches to a stop. I get wide-eyed and start stuttering, "Uh... well uh." That's because I don't want to uh....well....uh. Fine, I will "type" it right here, right now. I don't want to send my kids to preschool.

Why do I have such apprehension sharing this information with other moms? I am afraid that another mom will think I am judging her for sending her kids to preschool. I am afraid that another mom will think I am not smart enough to teach my kids the lessons they must learn to enter kindergarten as an equal. I am afraid that they will think I am too controlling. I don't understand why a voluntary program has become mandatory among mothers.

Oh do I have days, weeks and, yes, months where I wish my kids were in school a few hours a week. I do wish that. I wish it and I wish it some more. However, this time, the time where my children look at me with eyes wide open willing to believe everything I say to them, (except when I say, "Don't do that. You will poke her eyes out.") I want to be that constant influence in their life. I want to teach them as much as I can before they enter a public domain full of good and not so good people. It is voluntary. I am capable of teaching my kids the ABCs, 123s, our address and names. I can even teach them to color, solve puzzles, sit and listen to a book, follow instructions, play well with others and all of the social skills. I can do it. They will enjoy it because I offer what no one else can. I offer them a mother's love. No matter how hard the days are, no matter how red my face gets, or how hoarse I get from talking loudly (yes, yelling) I love them like no one else can love them. Plus, I want to enjoy them before the mandatory schooling starts and the hormones begin to overflow.

Now, you see this is not where I am trying to make the moms who choose PreK feel less than. That is certainly not my intention. This is me explaining my thoughts to those who question my motives for my children. I don't wish to make my children socially awkward or lacking academically. I love them and I want what I think is best for them. It is that simple.

Being a mom has many difficulties that I never imagined to be. I never imagined that I could feel so much pressure from other parents on what's best for me and them. To be a parent, is challenging. I want so many opportunities and life-gifts for my children and each day I make choices to ensure they have a rich and full life. It seems so simple to peer into a family's life and suggest a path when the full picture can not be realized by simply watching. This is me accepting the path I have chosen and praying to God that I am doing what is best for my children. Afterall, it is a voluntary program.